okay pat passed out under dana's car
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
