i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I think your dad took our porno
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
