Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
