i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You took a bar mat shot.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize