Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I love you.
Bad choice
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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