In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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