tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize