We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
