A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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