I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
