my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
