i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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