You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
