I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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