when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
