Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize