I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
