I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
