he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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