nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
