It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize