Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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