check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
