Apparently you make a good broom.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
