She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
