definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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