We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
So much Jack, so little girl.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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