She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize