I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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