You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize