When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
