I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
