so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
