Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Randomize
