Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
