so that wasnt chicken after all
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
