its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Randomize
