took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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