just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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