No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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