i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
