i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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