Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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