i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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