Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize