If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
