He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Edward fifth and chaser hands
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
sex in a hospital.. check
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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