Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
