At least make sure they are 18
Why
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
