Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
