You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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